Groan

Anything goes, and mine's a Guinness.
bill_qaz
Posts: 1004
Joined: Mon Aug 19, 2013 4:53 pm
Has thanked: 689 times
Been thanked: 898 times

Re: Groan

Post by bill_qaz »

IMG-20210907-WA0001.jpg
IMG-20210907-WA0001.jpg (72.36 KiB) Viewed 1584 times
bill_qaz
Posts: 1004
Joined: Mon Aug 19, 2013 4:53 pm
Has thanked: 689 times
Been thanked: 898 times

Re: Groan

Post by bill_qaz »

During a church service, the pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers. Suzie stood and walked to the podium. She said, “Two months ago, my husband, Phil, had a terrible motorcycle accident and his scrotum was crushed.”


There was a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation.“Phil was unable to hold me or the children,” she went on, “and every move caused him terrible pain. We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and they were able to reconstruct the crushed remnants of Phil’s scrotum, using wire to reinforce and shape it.”


The men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably.“Now,” she announced in a quivering voice, “thank the Lord, Phil is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely.” All the men sighed with relief.

 

The pastor rose and asked if anyone else had something to say. A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium. He said, “I’m Phil.”

The entire congregation held its breath.

“I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum.”
User avatar
Hugh
Posts: 1294
Joined: Sat Sep 10, 2016 1:54 pm
Has thanked: 871 times
Been thanked: 928 times

Re: Groan

Post by Hugh »

Greetings,

What is life if you don't take chances :o
golf.jpeg
golf.jpeg (39.6 KiB) Viewed 1471 times
TTFN

Hugh.
daveuprite
Posts: 4790
Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2012 10:47 pm
Location: Limousin France
Has thanked: 2452 times
Been thanked: 3293 times

Re: Groan

Post by daveuprite »

Image
HarveyCamm
Posts: 761
Joined: Thu Apr 28, 2011 9:08 am
Location: Lincolnshire
Has thanked: 76 times
Been thanked: 123 times

Re: Groan

Post by HarveyCamm »

daveuprite wrote: Fri Sep 17, 2021 1:30 pm Image
I've been caught by one of those traps except they'd used tequila instead of whisky, those little rocks don't half give you a headache next day!
daveuprite
Posts: 4790
Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2012 10:47 pm
Location: Limousin France
Has thanked: 2452 times
Been thanked: 3293 times

Re: Groan

Post by daveuprite »

Image
bill_qaz
Posts: 1004
Joined: Mon Aug 19, 2013 4:53 pm
Has thanked: 689 times
Been thanked: 898 times

Re: Groan

Post by bill_qaz »

daveuprite wrote: Mon Sep 20, 2021 4:07 pm Image
That's because we had heard it before :idea:
daveuprite
Posts: 4790
Joined: Fri Dec 28, 2012 10:47 pm
Location: Limousin France
Has thanked: 2452 times
Been thanked: 3293 times

Re: Groan

Post by daveuprite »

bill_qaz wrote: Mon Sep 20, 2021 6:25 pm
daveuprite wrote: Mon Sep 20, 2021 4:07 pm Image
That's because we had heard it before :idea:
Yep, I keep getting deja vu over and over again...
bill_qaz
Posts: 1004
Joined: Mon Aug 19, 2013 4:53 pm
Has thanked: 689 times
Been thanked: 898 times

Re: Groan

Post by bill_qaz »

Screenshot_20210921-102922_Outlook.jpg
Screenshot_20210921-102922_Outlook.jpg (71.48 KiB) Viewed 1228 times
User avatar
Elmer J Fudd
Posts: 459
Joined: Sat Aug 05, 2017 7:37 pm
Has thanked: 77 times
Been thanked: 222 times

Re: Groan

Post by Elmer J Fudd »

toon.jpg
toon.jpg (114.81 KiB) Viewed 1153 times
Post Reply

Return to “THE PUB”